no guides no posts

"At first the sun shone and we dropped our packs to climb. At the top I could see down the river. But as night came rain caused the earth to turn to grasping muck. At 12 o'clock a Door opened. In the coldblackrainnumbing mud I knew it had begun. I became a cloud and have been drifting ever since."

bed full of silverfish shades clacking no one awake in this world but me... too full of ifs as to pomfret south and checking accounts and how to pay for the car much less the next few months...too early to rise for one who cant sleep anyway but what else is there to do when there is no dreamquest of kadath ah dear howard

some sense of relief here not to be constrained by the usual fences no one listens anyway so why bother trying to run with the herd... thats cute, a herd... yeah, some herd heads down just bumping on through life no knowledge of rothkomotherwellklinedekooningpatchenjeffers even stella some herd that one was and dream destroyed kerouac poor weird guy he turned out to be so sick and sad and mumbling on the floor dead liver and the girls all running the other way... dear daughter jan fifteen and pregnant horse leech ridden headed south to florida mine too, same boat it seems

how funny the world leads us to each other... coincidence am wondering or some common thread that runs between all those of like minds and spirits

some world huh, a real sweet thing to look forward to when one is young but who ever thinks about that cause we really have no leaders no guides no posts to which are tacked advice... soooo, here i am sleeping with the silverfish while the world is quiet and some have dreams of light less darkness and I...I...just wonder, wonder at it all.

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